Exhausted

Wow. I. Am. Tired.

I knew being a breast feeding exclusive mom that I would be up frequently feeding this little guy, but wow am I beat. Matthew has been eating every 2 to 2.5 hours day and night. I would do anything for a 4, 5, or 6 hour stretch of sleep. I don't function well on little bits of sleep, and I am starting to feel the effects of lack of sleep. When I'm over tired all I do is cry. Today, my hubs came home and asked how my day was and all I said was that all I want is to sleep for a long stretch of time. I know that eventually Matthew will sleep for longer periods of time, but I'm struggling a bit right now. The plan for me to get more sleep is that I will pump a bottle for Adam to give Matthew on Saturday morning for the 6:00ish feeding.

I would suggest to pump a bottle for a middle of the night feeding, but Adam has had 2 more seizures since the post I made in February. He had one in November, and another one in the hospital the last night we were there when Matthew was born. We've pretty much linked the seizures to being over tired/exhausted. Therefore I have been responsible for all middle of the night baby duties. I am happy to do them because it's what my son needs, but it is also what my husband needs. I need him to be the best person/dad he can be during the day as he is working full-time and being super dad when he gets home and on weekends. He needs his rest to be healthy. I feel less anxiety about the seizures, but it still makes me a nervous wreck to know that it can happen at any time. The doctor upped the dosage for his meds, so hopefully he doesn't have any more.

So far, the hardest part of being a new parent is the pure exhaustion I feel at this point. I pray that this little boy give me a long stretch of sleep SOON! = )